Who Am I? I am currently a Junior at The University of Texas at Dallas. If and when you become a reality, I may no longer be alive. I would like you or anyone else out there to know a bit of what I have dealt with to get to this point.
I am a Granddaughter trying to accomplish a dream and a promise, I made to my dying grandfather. When I graduated from High School getting a higher education was not in my plans. After struggling with infertility, my son was born on September 2013. That is when I realized the importance of pursing a higher Education. I returned to my local community college and received my Associates Degree. It was difficult trying to juggle being a wife, mom, student, and employee but I did it. Yes, it took me longer than it should but no doubt worth every tear and obstacle presented.
I am a Wife that struggles to balance household obligations, such as having a home cooked meal everyday. Trying to juggle the priority of what should be done first the laundry or studying for the next exam.
I am a Mom that is constantly battling with the thought, “Am I being a good mother?” Always wondering if the time I sacrifice being with my son pay off? Or will he resent the fact that I wasn’t there to tuck him into bed? A mom that only hopes to provide greater and better experiences than my own. One who is constantly over analyzing if I am doing everything to the best of my ability. Yes, I am that mom that wants to shield her son from this world that is often cruel to one another. As technology continues to advance making us lose that essence of being empathetic with one another.
I am a Daughter that is still trying to find that sense of parental approval. Looking back, I have accomplished so much but it never feels like enough.
I am a Woman that has lost herself in between all the hats I wear. Yes, I am that woman that has lost her essence of being herself not only mentally but physically. Looking into the mirror and not seeing the person who I once was. Dealing with a chronic Hypothyroidism that has changed every aspect of myself.
Who Am I? I am a Warrior that carries many scars, but still I stand. I wear many hats that feel overwhelming at times, but still I stand. Yes, I am a granddaughter, wife, mom, daughter, student, employee and a woman that struggles, but still I stand. Through every doubt, fear, and obstacle I stand. No matter how many times I fall, I will stand. As I enter my Senior year I look forward to standing on the stage receiving my diploma, and remembering how far I have come. I stand before you not with my physical self but through words. If and when you do become a reality, I hope you have a sense of what it was like to live in my shoes for a brief moment.